


New Frontiers

by Azertyrobaz



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, The Mandalorian (TV)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Family Feels, Friendship, Gen, Stream of Consciousness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-08
Updated: 2020-07-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:21:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25152319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Azertyrobaz/pseuds/Azertyrobaz
Summary: Din is injured and loses his grip on reality. Or does he? Cara is doing what she can to be the best aunt and sister possible, but her aliit isn't cooperating. Angsty one shot but with a happy ending.
Relationships: Baby Yoda & The Mandalorian (The Mandalorian TV), Cara Dune & The Mandalorian (The Mandalorian TV), Din Djarin & Grogu | Baby Yoda
Comments: 20
Kudos: 118





	New Frontiers

**Author's Note:**

> Previous knowledge of the stories 'Midnight' to learn about how Cara became Din's sister and 'The Boy With No Name' to find out how Baby Yoda got his name is recommended, but not compulsory to enjoy this one-shot.
> 
> A bit of a tearjerker story, but the resolution is a happy one. Can be considered as the first part to my next installment, the follow-up to 'Midnight', which should be written once I complete 'Times Like These'.
> 
> Title (and atmosphere) heavily inspired by the M83 remix of the song "The Pioneers" by Bloc Party, which I highly recommend.
> 
> As always, feel free to kudos and comment, I hope you enjoy. :)

** New Frontiers **

_If it can be broken then it can be fixed, if it can be fused then it can be split  
It's all under control…  
If it can be lost then it can be won, if it can be touched then it can be turned  
All you need is time…_

_We promised the world we'd tame it, what were we hoping for?_

_A sense of purpose and a sense of skill, a sense of function but a disregard  
We will not be the first…  
You said you were going to conquer new frontiers,  
Go stick your bloody head in the jaws of the beast_

_We promised the world, we'd tame it, what were we hoping for?_

_Breathe in, breathe out_

(Bloc Party, “The Pioneers”, _Silent Alarm_ )

It had started as a simple enough plan – Cara would get the bounty, and he would go gather intel following a tip they’d been given on Tatooine recently, accompanied by the kid. It wasn’t often that the same planet – hell, the same _system_ – housed both a job and possible clues to help him on his quest. And when that happened, it usually ended up the same way: Cara got the prize, and he got nothing. This was also proving to be another dead end.

Except this time, he hadn’t anticipated to be attacked as well. His skill had kicked in – he didn’t leave _all_ the bounties to Cara, after all, and had been doing this particular job for a long time – but he had the kid to protect, strapped to his chest, and therefore took a little more time than usual to get rid of the greedy man, who had taken one look at the alien baby before deciding he wanted him for himself. Din couldn’t be sure if he knew about the child, or had any valuable information regarding his species. He only knew that he needed to get rid of him, and fast.

He was now slowly making his way back to the Crest. Slowly, because the injury he’d sustained was proving problematic, and the whining boy against him kept reminding him of that fact.

“I’ll be alright, _ad’ika_ ,” he told him in a huff, his breath coming in short pants.

But the truth was, Din wasn’t so sure. Countless blades had pierced his skin over the years, and this wound had started no differently than the others – just a cut on his left side, right underneath his arm where he knew he was less protected – but after a few minutes, he’d felt an undercurrent of panic slowly settling in. Warmth spreading. His head splitting up in pain and his vision blurring.

 _Poison_.

That blade had been laced with something. Din didn’t allow himself the necessary time to search the corpse of his attacker to find traces of the mixture to figure out what it was, because he needed to reach the Razor Crest promptly. He had no idea how fast acting or lethal this particular poison was, and it actually didn’t matter: any antidote he had – and he hoped one would do the trick – was on his ship.

He should have known that a tip picked up on Tatooine wouldn’t be worth shit…

The Crest was slowly coming into view, but Din was getting more and more unsure that he would actually be able to reach it. His whole left side was on fire and he could barely see where he was going. _Must have been a pretty bad one then_ , he mused, wondering if his wildly beating heart was about to give out or if he’d be permitted to merely pass out. Hopefully, Cara would be done soon and once more come to his rescue. Hopefully…

“ _Nayc!_ ”

Naji, his son, apparently disagreed with his uncertainty. There wasn’t a lot of words in his vocabulary yet, but unsurprisingly the Mando’a word for ‘no’ had been quickly grasped.

Din took in a deep breath and tried to rein in and harness the pain he felt to put one foot after the other. The boy was right. He couldn’t just collapse out there – it wasn’t safe. Naji had to be safe. Which meant he had to keep going. Even if his limbs shook and his ears buzzed. Even if the terror caused by the toxin entering his bloodstream was ever consuming.

_He was going to die._

A mumble from the kid he couldn’t decipher.

He just had to make it to the ship. Engage security ground protocols. Look for the antidotes in his med kit. Wait for Cara. Din kept repeating those four tasks to himself like a mantra as he was stumbling towards the Crest. _Enter the ship. Secure it. Antidotes. Cara. Enter the ship. Secure it. Antidotes. Cara. Enter the ship…_

But that was as far as he managed to go, in the end. With a shudder, he passed out as soon as he got inside, his last conscious thought making sure he wasn’t crushing the boy in his fall.

* * *

Din opened his eyes slowly. It was pitch black, wherever he was, but the ground was soft under him and smelled of earth. His hands, uncooperative at first, told him that he was right – he was lying down somewhere outside on loose soil. Somewhere that was neither cold, nor overly warm. The temperature just right. Somewhere he felt no pain. In his side, where he remembered he’d been stabbed, or anywhere else for that matter, where lingering injuries always made themselves known.

 _Somewhere he wasn’t wearing his armor_ , he suddenly became aware of, and sat up quickly.

His eyes were getting used to the obscurity, and he realized that it wasn’t dark at all. There was a camp fire burning a few yards across from him, the smoke and heat only now reaching his senses and filling him with a sense of warmth, and safety. Deep down, he knew he wasn’t supposed to be feeling so at ease – he was defenseless in an unknown location. A quick check told him that he was unarmed and wearing loose cotton clothing he was unfamiliar with. Dislodging the hood that covered his head, his face reassuringly felt like his own under his bare hands though, overgrown stubble and all, and once more he wondered why he wasn’t panicking at the absence of his helmet.

_Was he dreaming?_

Trees were now appearing in his line of vision. High fir trees that reached the night sky and seemed to almost touch the stars. He was in a forest, one that felt strangely familiar. Yet something wasn’t _quite_ right. And it wasn’t just the fact that he couldn’t feel any wound under his left arm, or any of the numerous scars that he knew littered the rest of his back and chest.

Someone had just appeared next to the fire. A woman, as far as he could tell. Just sitting there patiently, not turning towards him. Waiting. _Waiting for him?_ There was something so familiar about her. It was on the tip of his tongue. If he could just focus…

“I didn’t know what else to do.”

The voice had come from nowhere. A soft, lilting voice. A child’s voice.

“You were slipping away and I got scared.”

The same voice again, but nearer. Din looked everywhere – all around him, towards the woman who still hadn’t moved by the fire, above his head…

“Who are you?” he asked out loud, his own voice sounding foreign to his ears.

“I’m sorry, _buir._ I really tried. Please believe me when I say that I tried.”

“ _Ad’ika_?” Din wondered in disbelief, as he’d never heard his child use so many words when he spoke before. “Is that you? Where are you?”

“I’m right here,” the small voice replied, and there he was – his boy, appearing next to him on the forest floor. Wearing the clothes he was certain he’d put on him this very morning. The tiny blue outfit that Cara had found on that market a few systems ago.

“Naji? What are you doing here?” he queried stupidly, as if pondering about a dream’s logic made any sense.

“I created this place. Do you like it?”

The voice was coming directly in his head now, but the boy’s lips weren’t moving. The rest of his face though, his eyes in particular… It really felt like it was him communicating.

“I thought you’d feel safe, here. _I_ feel safe here,” the boy added, and it stopped feeling strange not to see his mouth form the words as he spoke. Din just accepted that it was normal. After all, he was dreaming. Where was the harm?

“What is this place?” he pressed, marveling at how real everything seemed – the sound of the wind in the branches, the feel of the soft earth against his palms, the smoke of the fire tickling his nose. _Yes_ , he did feel safe here. It was just like…

“I didn’t know what else to do...” Naji’s voice repeated, sounding mournful, his son’s physical projection – or whatever it was – lowering his ears in sorrow. “I couldn’t heal you this time.”

“Oh, _Naj’ika_ , it’s okay,” Din whispered, grabbing his kid and hugging him as he would if he was awake. “You know you’re not supposed to heal me anyway,” he reminded him, and he could swear he felt the bundle heave a sigh in his arms. It all seemed so _real_. The feel of the small body against him exactly right. Small hands reaching for his neck like they always did.

Din assumed that he’d simply passed out, and that the poison coursing through his veins had helped him conjure up this very authentic illusion. It wasn’t _so_ bad, all things considered. A world where he felt no pain and could speak to his son. Until Naji started talking directly in his mind again, words that even in dreams made little sense.

“You should go talk to her, _buir_. She’s been waiting for a while and I don’t know how long…” Another tired sigh. “How long I’ll manage to keep her here.”

The small weight fell heavy against his chest all of a sudden. If he didn’t know any better, he’d think the child was falling asleep. _But why would be he falling asleep if he was already in a dream?_ Choosing not to question the weird state of his mind again, Din shook him slightly.

“Who are you talking about, little one? The woman by the fire?”

A nod against his neck, and this time he was certain the boy was asleep. He gently lowered his arms to make sure, and was proven right. Except that Naji was grimacing in his slumber, his little fists tight and his ears rigid. Din frowned at the sight and wondered what it meant. Then he started wondering if he’d ever questioned the significance of a dream _while_ dreaming before, and stopped.

Everything was going to be fine – the poison hadn’t killed him and he just had to wait until Cara got back to the ship and figured things out. She always did, after all. And she’d make sure to remind him daily of the fact that she’d saved his ass again. Until then, he could humor his own delusion and follow his son’s advice: he’d go talk to the mysterious woman.

He hugged the child to his chest again and stood up, his knees blissfully silent and pain free for once. The warmth of the fire felt pleasant on the bare skin of his face in his approach – dreams where he wasn’t wearing his _buy’ce_ were so rare that he let himself enjoy it.

As he got near, he saw that the woman was wearing similar clothes to his – a loose dress in heavy cotton. Her face remained hidden under a shawl, but the light granted by the fire allowed him to make another discovery that stopped him in his tracks. They were both wearing red. A deep, dark red that always evoked contradictory feelings inside him. Safety and death. Life and smoke.

And then she turned her head towards him and he sat down heavily where he stood.

Surely a dream of his wouldn’t be so cruel. Surely the poison had devised this trick to torture him some more. And yet the details on her face… He’d never remembered them so clearly before. Was that the toxin acting up and filling out the features he’d forgotten? The parting of her hair? The curve of her eyebrows? Din closed his eyes forcefully, wishing he’d never seen her again. It was a distorted memory, nothing else. It wasn’t real. It was worse than physical pain, and he hoped he could feel all his injuries again instead.

“Din, my beautiful boy, look at me.”

He felt hands framing his face. Soft hands that barely covered his cheeks now. Had he ever been able to close his eyes in a dream before? He didn’t know. But the reassuring weight of his sleeping child was still there, and he pressed him more tightly against his chest to give him courage before opening his eyes again.

“It’s you, it’s really you my son,” the woman marveled, drinking in his features with her eyes and fingers, lingering on his brow then in his hair.

She hadn’t aged. She looked exactly like she had that day, and then some more, as he was sure his mind had never conjured the fullness of her lips when she smiled, so similar to his own, in such a perfect way.

Din didn’t know what to say, and barely remembered to breathe. Something else he had never been aware he needed to do in a dream. He stared at her roaming eyes and felt his free hand twitch against his side. He _ached_ to touch her, too. Smell her hair. Hear her voice again. Would it be so bad if he relented? If he allowed this? This was still his dream, right? He should be able to do what he wanted.

There were tears in her eyes now, despite her beaming smile, and the sight broke the flimsy hold he still had over his emotions. Din raised his right arm and looped it around her neck, pressing her tightly against him, Naji between them. He breathed in again, the smell of smoke mixing with the essence that was just _her_ and he all but collapsed in his remembered grief, her arms tightening around him.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you,” she whispered in his ear, and Din realized that he was shaking, tears escaping his eyes. Tears that didn’t seem to want to stop. “I’ve got you,” his mother repeated, tenderly cradling his face against her neck and rocking him slowly.

“You’ve been so brave Din, so brave!” she told him in a soothing voice, carding her fingers through his hair. “And we’re all so proud of you,” she added, Din trying to control his trembling. There was so much he wanted to say! But the words remained stubbornly stuck in his throat.

He let one last tremor course through him, then forced himself to look up, his arm still around her, not wanting to part from her now that he had allowed himself to accept that she was there.

“I wish your father could see you, too. See how beautiful and strong you’ve become,” she said, one of her hands still stroking his cheek fondly. “But it was probably too much for him to bring the both of us here.”

“Too much? What do you mean?” he asked, his voice hoarse and full of tears still.

“Don’t you know what this place is?” she frowned and Din felt dread creeping up his chest. This was still only a dream, right? He shook his head slowly and swallowed hard.

“It’s the in-between place. Limbo, some old religions called it.”

“In between…”

“Life and death, yes,” she completed. “And oh, how I wish this day had come later! But if you’re still here, then there might be a chance for you to go back.”

“To go back?” he repeated dumbly.

“To life of course, my darling son. I assume that’s why he gave us this chance to see each other.”

Din’s mind was racing. Nothing made sense. Dreams were meaningless but this was…more. More than an illusion. More than poison clouding his reality. This was…

“Who are you talking about? Who got you here?” he remembered asking, her smile still so pure it hurt and the feel of her hand in his hair agonizingly tangible.

“Your own son,” she replied simply, eyeing the sleeping bundle still cradled against his chest. “Your own beautiful, wonderful son.”

And then it all started to make more sense. How Naji had said he’d tried to heal him and had created this place for him instead. And how tense he looked in his slumber – he wasn’t asleep, he was still trying to fix him somehow.

“Do you mean he is the one…holding me here?” he asked to make sure – but make sure of what? Surely this was impossible!

“Yes, and he’s the one who brought me here as well,” his mother supplied.

“But this is too much, he’s so small, he shouldn’t be doing that,” Din lamented, and he looked at his child in anguish. Saw how creased his brow was in concentration. This couldn’t be good. Whatever unknown, miraculous strength he had, it must be draining him.

“I think he doesn’t want to let you go either, my sweet boy,” she smiled sadly.

 _Parents_ were supposed to sacrifice themselves for their children, not the other way around. And his mother’s presence here, wherever _here_ was, was proof of that.

“I wish you’d both gone down in the bunker with me on that day. The Mandalorians were right there…” he blurted out, finally getting to the words he had wanted to say since he recognized her.

“We did exactly what we were meant to do. And as much as it pains me to say it because seeing you and holding you again is a gift, I wish you were able to go back to your life,” she lamented, taking his hand in hers. “You still have so much to look forward to.”

Din was torn. Part of him wanted to stay here forever and see all the people that he had lost again. But he also had a responsibility. To his Creed. To his Clan. And especially to his son.

“If he lets me go, then what happens?” he finally asked.

“Then… We both go beyond.”

Beyond, to a world without pain, and loss and grief and doubt? A world where he wouldn’t have to wake up every day with the constant reminder that he had survived, when so many hadn’t? A world where he didn’t have to wonder if each and every one of his acts or decisions were in accordance to the Creed? A world where he didn’t have to keep on trying to find traces of people he actually never wanted to find? Because all he wanted was for the chance to hold on to _one_ thing for once? And for everything else to just _stop_?

“I’m so tired…” he admitted out loud. The confession a luxury he never indulged in, but this was his _mother_. And he felt like if there was one person in the whole universe he could reveal this to, it was her.

“I know, my darling,” she replied softly, her hand back to stroking his cheek, and he pressed it with his own, deepening the contact.

He looked into her warm brown eyes, then focused on his son again. This was for the best. And he tried not to feel like he was choosing the easy way out.

“ _Naj’ika_ , you have to let me go,” he whispered to him, holding him closer.

The little boy immediately stirred and started fidgeting and fussing.

“ _Nayc…_ ” the tired childlike voice mumbled in his mind.

“This is too much, you’re hurting yourself, and I don’t want that,” he tried to reason with him. Like he always did when he attempted to heal his various injuries. And there had been a few in the two years they had shared together. Two years that would still count for something, right?

“ _Buir…_ ” the little one complained, “I don’t want you to go.”

His eyes opened again, and he knew staring at the wide dark orbs would be difficult, but he had to be strong for the both of them – he didn’t see another way out. If his boy was the only thing preventing him from dying, then it was already too late. The poison had done its job and nothing Cara attempted would work.

“I’m so sorry, _ad’ika_ ,” Din tried to soothe him, his palm calmly stroking his brow. “I know you’ve tried your very best to save me but you have to stop, now. You’ll wake up on the ship, and Cara will soon be there if she isn’t already, and I’ll be okay here.”

“I don’t want Cara!” he yelled at a surprising volume, and Din flinched. His lips might not be moving but this was definitely his son’s temper coming through.

“You love your _ba’vodu_ , and she’ll be good to you, she’ll…”

“This wasn’t supposed to happen!” he carried on in the same tone. “You’re not supposed to die today, you’re not supposed to die for a very long time!”

“Naji, I wish…” he tried again, but it was no use. The boy was standing up on his leg, shaking his head and swaying slightly, placing both his hands against his chest.

“Look, _buir_ , look!” the child’s voice demanded, and Din suddenly felt nauseous, as a multitude of bright images invaded his mind. “This is our _aliit_ , and it grows, and we are all happy,” he professed.

The images finally stopped and he saw, just for a second, children walking ahead of him in a field of tall grass. Some with unruly hair like his. And felt a small hand holding his. And brown eyes staring up at him. And a silhouette far ahead who seemed familiar and yet not. And then it stopped.

He’d only caught a glimpse of it but he’d _felt_ it. This was _his_ family, his _aliit_ , Naji was right. And it was…everything. But his son had used this trick in the past. Invading his dreams to influence his thinking. And it had worked. Did it mean that he was showing him the truth? Or was he showing him exactly what he knew he wanted to see? He didn’t understand his power and had no proof that whatever he had seen was reality. Or another dream. Or just hope for a better future.

Still reeling from the vision, he looked up at his mother, and from her expression deduced that she had somehow seen it too.

“Is it…” But before he could complete his question, he felt a sharp pain in his shoulder and gasped. There was no pain here, what was happening? He stared at the boy, but he seemed just as surprised as him.

And then his chest felt like it was splitting in two. And then again. And again. And the forest started to dissolve. And his mother beamed at him with the widest smile he had ever seen, and she just had time to mouth three little words before…

“You _fucking_ idiot, you died!” Cara yelled, and Din opened his eyes again.

* * *

He took in a huge breath, and immediately regretted it – he felt pain _everywhere_. His chest, his side, his shoulder...

“You were dead! Your heart stopped beating!” his sister repeated, and Din felt the hard metallic floor of the ship under him, and saw angry fluorescent lights above.

“I was, I was…” he tried, but _dammit_ it hurt so much to breathe.

“You were poisoned, I know! I injected you with the most powerful antidote we had but you were still _not breathing_ , you monumental pain in the ass!”

Din finally managed to move his arms, and saw that she had removed part of his armor and top layers, and felt with his fingers that the skin of his chest was extremely tender.

“Yeah, sorry about that,” she said, even though she sounded anything _but_ sorry. “I removed your helmet too so that you could breathe, and I wasn’t sure how beskar would react with the defibrillator.”

“We have a defibrillator?” he asked stupidly, his voice hoarse, as this wasn’t something that would prove very useful when traveling alone and that he definitely hadn’t bought.

“Of _course_ we have a defibrillator, and good thing we did!”

“Is it supposed to…hurt this much?” he managed to say, finally laying his eyes on Naji next to him. He seemed to be asleep for real this time, his small chest rising up and down reassuringly and his ears relaxed.

“I might have cranked it a bit high,” she admitted. “I think the human setting is 60%.”

“And you gave me…?” he asked, dreading her answer.

“110%.”

“Right, of course you did,” Din replied, wondering if the pain in his ribs would ever stop. Or if it was just his usual level of pain and he had forgotten. He looked up towards Cara and saw that she _actually_ did seem worried, and he felt bad.

“Was the next step mouth to mouth?” he tried for levity, and it seemed to do the trick as she handed him his _buy’ce_ not too gently, scolding.

“In your dreams, Djarin,” she huffed, and he tried sitting up. Cara had to help him in the end, as his head was still spinning.

To think that only a few minutes earlier he’d been… But Din didn’t say anything. He replaced his chest plate and the helmet on his head, then hugged his sleeping son gently, remembering to take small breaths.

“Did he try to heal you, is that why he’s passed out?” Cara asked, and Din nodded.

Part of him wanted to tell her everything. While another part was afraid that she would dismiss it. Tell him it had only been a dream, nothing else. But he could still smell the camp fire smoke. Feel his mother’s hand stroking his cheek. And see his _aliit_ walking in the long grass field.

Some twelve hours later, when the child finally woke up from his torpor, he sighed in relief. He almost expected the boy to start speaking like he had in the in-between world, but he didn’t. Instead, he curled up against him in clear happiness, called him Boo Boo, and wouldn’t let go of him for the rest of the day. Or the following one.

And when he finally went to sleep again, he saw something in his eyes that told him that the reason why he hadn’t forgotten anything from his illusion was because it hadn’t been one at all. A dream, he would have forgotten by now. At least parts of it. But he hadn’t. Quite the contrary. The knowing look in his son’s eyes told him that he also remembered all of it. And that maybe, just maybe, it would all be alright.


End file.
